A good therapist can offer you something most other people cannot: psychological information on how to explain troubling emotions, better manage stress, and obtain an objective perspective from somebody not involved in your personal life.

No therapist, however, can offer you a substitute for friendship; or romance; or self-initiative; or, most importantly, belief in your ability to use your mind, and your rational judgment, properly and effectively.

When asked what client’s want to see happen as a result of therapy, many have no answer. Or, have a very vague answer, such as "happiness" or "self-esteem." Some client’s believe that a psychotherapist will somehow be able to bestow these things, in God-like fashion, upon them.

What happens when these open-ended, expensive conversations fail to make everything all better? The therapy client may become depressed. He might blame himself for the therapy's failure. Or he might claim it as further evidence that he is not "meant" (meant by whom?) to have a happy and fulfilling life. Or he might blame the therapist. Maybe if he just found the therapist with the right degree, from the right school, of the right age, with the right social connections, or the right number of letters past his name, then maybe everything would work out...

What is the alternative to approaching therapy in such a passive, mystical manner?

Learning the skills of self-initiative and self-confidence in your own judgment.

What is self-initiative? What rules or principles does a self-initiating person follow? Upon what ideas, and self-statements, does self-initiative depend? Here are a few:

	I alone am responsible for making my life happy. Others can help me, if they choose and if I want them to, but the fundamental responsibility is still mine.
	I must allow myself to make mistakes. Mistakes are part of the process, and are even good because they point out what I do not know and add to my storehouse of knowledge.
	I will treat obstacles as opportunities. If I reach a roadblock with one of my goals, I will not say, "Uh-oh, it's all over." Instead, I will say, "There must be a better way to reach my goal and I will not give up until I find it." Nothing worthwhile is accomplished easily; otherwise, everyone would be doing it.